Lana Bell is a middle eastern skank who cheats on her white husband.

Lana Bell is a skank who cheats on her husband while he’s away at work. From what I could sus out from our conversations, her husband is a hard-working pilot who’s constantly away.

She claims to work in real estate, dabbles in interior design and pretends to be some sort of Instagram and Pinterest influencer. But from what I’ve observed, she has a lot of free time and spends most of it taking selfies, ordering takeout, and playing with her pet. She’s obviously full of shit.

I was only in Dubai for only two weeks and this chick kept hounding me on Tinder. She would ask about my background, my penis size, and requested shirtless selfies.

Normally I’d feel bad for any man whose wife sleeps around but I got the feeling her husband was also a freak who got off on being cucked. At one point, I kept expecting this chick to ask me to be part of their throuple. She mentioned being part of the mile high club when she used to be a flight attendant and snuck off with her pilot husband.

I had to put up with her long talks about her favorite musicians (its Mika by the way), favorite songs (Big Girls Don’t Cry), her parents’ separation, her anxiety about her mom’s safety in Lebanon, her mother-in-law passing away, missing her old job at Porter Airline and dissatisfaction with married life before I was finally able to get her to go down on me. She gave sloppy blowjobs and used way too much teeth.

She makes you put in a lot of work for goddamn blowjob. Not only that, but I also had to drop a lot of money on pricey UAE restaurants, tequila shots and hookah bars before I could finally get her in bed. Not worth the trouble. I resent her for wasting all my vacation money.

Stay away from this chick. She’ll get you horny and waste all your money before you’ll be able to get her in bed. I also think she should really hide her husband’s pictures prior to sex. It’s really awkward trying to climax while he stares at me the entire time.  :\

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